Obituary of Joel Berry

October 23, 2026

When he was four years old, Joel Berry sent a note to a family friend’s newborn. It said: I love you very much. Isn’t it fun being in the world? Isn’t it beautiful in the world?

He never lost that sense of awe before his unexpected death on October 23, 2026 at his home in the Bronx, New York. Joel was 43 years old. He was born on June 24, 1983 in Berkeley, California.

A graduate of Horace Mann School, class of 2000, Joel loved his New York City, would take photos of the skyline and storms and sunsets from his apartment’s rooftop and send them with notes of gratitude for the place he lived. He took extremely long walks, stopping at museums, photographing the graffiti that he considered high art. Photography was one of his primary creative outlets, along with music, which he composed with passion for decades.

A lifelong fascination with the universe, both spiritually and cosmologically, inspired him to write a letter to physicist Michio Kaku, author of Hyperspace. Kaku, who replied, had no idea Joel was eleven. More recently, he wrote to a young activist in despair about the state of the world:

“The suffering is unimaginable in scale and scope,” Joel wrote, “but also, it is finite. Only species that transcend the evolutionary pressures that select for ruthless cruelty would survive the Great Filter and make it to the stars. Thus, the universe itself ultimately selects for empathy, cooperation and long-term planning; the Golden Rule on a cosmic scale.”

He and his wife shared a dedication to animal rights and attended demonstrations in New York City, before they moved to Oregon to have their beloved daughter. Joel felt his greatest achievement was his daughter, and he was enormously proud of her kindness, intelligence, and grace. He loved her above all else.

In addition to his wife, Allison Berry, with whom he was separated, and daughter, Rachel Berry, Joel is survived by his parents, Jonathan Berry and Robin Dellabough, his sister, Flynn Berry, as well as a brother-in-law, two nephews, and many aunts, uncles, and cousins who mourn his loss.

In his twenties, Joel discovered Marcus Aurelius and looked to the Roman Stoic philosopher as a guide in what was often a challenging life. One of his favorite Aurelius quotes: “When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive—to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.”

A Quaker memorial service will be held on Saturday, November 28 at 1 p.m. Purchase Friends Meeting House, 4455 Purchase Street, Purchase, New York. Photographs and memories can be shared here https://my.gather.app/remember/joel-max-berry.

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